Daring to trust God’s Sovereignty

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Gone must be any discouragement that would cause us to forget God’s sovereignty over human affairs.

Instead, can we grasp the fact that other people simply cannot thwart God’s plan for our lives?
If He has called us to something, not only will He equip us, we can be sure that He will also provide the entry point needed for us to carry it out. If we are following His calling and lead, we need to learn to hear His quiet, “not now” within mere man’s louder, “No!”.

One of the things that must have spurred Joseph on while unfairly imprisoned for a crime he didn’t commit, was the vision God had granted him many years earlier, that remained yet unfulfilled.

While he grew in his trust of a faithful God, who made sure that the normal punishment (death) for Joseph’s “crime” (of which he was innocent and therefore unfairly imprisoned) was not enacted, he must also have grown in his certainty that God would provide the way out, in His own flawless timing. And the way OUT of prison, was the way IN to a position of prominence – just as God had foretold… because God is the Master orchestrator.

We too, though not relying on visions or prophetic utterances, can have the same certainty, and trust that God, who is eternally faithful, omnipotent and sovereign, will also work all things together for good to those who love Him and are called according to HIS purpose. (Romans 8:28)

2 Chronicles 16:9 tells us that, “The eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” The question then is: is my heart fully committed to Him? Are God’s priorities my priorities? Do I have a heart eager to be used by Him, for His glory, and to let my life be a light by which this dark world can’t help but notice? We must be vigilant in keeping an Eternal perspective, and not let ourselves get wearied by this world’s woes, nor let the weakness of our flesh tempt us toward failing and falling away from God. On our own we are all failures and frauds – but WITH Christ? We can do ALL things through His power at work in us. The key is staying fully committed and obedient to Christ, putting to death the deeds of the flesh, and fleeing the temptations of this world.

God has certain jobs for us to do, and He is more than able to set aside anyone else’s denial of the gifts and abilities that He has assigned each of us for His own purposes and pleasure, and to work His good where it looks “impossible.” In fact, I believe He enjoys showing evidence of His inescapable omnipotence and sovereignty in the face of seemingly impenetrable obstacles on behalf of those who love Him.

So even in the greatest of trials let us not be tempted to diminish His love for us, or His sovereignty over all situations, but instead let’s pray that He helps us fully surrender to His desire to use all that He allows in our lives as vehicles to display His power, grace, sufficiency and love.

“Behold, I am the LORD, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?” Jeremiah 32:27

The next time we are tempted to feel discouraged from a lack of impact or use of a spiritual gift that God has afforded us, let’s remember just Who is in control.

And keep in mind: the best posture from which to watch God move mountains is on our knees, as we ask Him to.

He is waiting for us to come to the realization that He delights in our trust of Him! So let’s hasten to deepen our trust in the fertile ground of His faithfulness, so that He can display His work in our lives all the more as we step out in obedience. Let’s begin praying for marvelous things in the Only Mighty Name – that of Jesus- then stand back! And watch the hand of our loving Lord carry out what only He can! 🙌🏼🌿

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A few things I have learned, sometimes the hard way, about resolving relational conflict:

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Recognize that time is short and none of us are promised tomorrow. Avoiding the person is not the same as reconciling. Stubbornly ignoring the problem could result in never getting back to a healthy relationship if we won’t take steps now. 🌿

“Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your heart…” Hebrews 3:15 

Try to see things from the other person’s perspective. Is it possible that in their shoes, you’d feel the same way? Have you considered how they arrived at their conclusion? Was a word misspoken or an action misunderstood? Communication is key, and simple clarification may resolve the entire thing. 🌿

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility and patience.” Colossians 3:12

We must not squander the gift of being able to ask God to help us. He longs for us to come to Him- He doesn’t want us languishing in broken relationships, and He alone can touch hearts. The first step we take should be that of getting down on our knees to send prayers up to God asking Him to do what only He can: soften our heart as well as the other person’s, asking His favor, grace and healing. 🌿

“This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.” I John 5:14 

Sometimes conflict is the result from being treated unfairly. Is there any lesson to be learned by going through an unjust hurt or trial? I believe so- it helps emphasize our own sin before a perfect and Holy God. It also can be a vehicle to build a deeper trust in God as we wait for Him to work on our behalf. 🌿

“Do not say, “I’ll pay you back for this wrong!” Wait for the Lord and he will deliver you.” Proverbs 20:22

Recognize that we all have different perspectives and opinions. Non-essentials like preferences should not take precedence over unity, especially between followers of Christ. 🌿

“How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!” Psalm 133:1

If the conflict is between a believer in Christ and a non-believer, we cannot expect them to hold to our same beliefs. Pray for their salvation, knowing that the work of the Holy Spirit alone can adequately convict a person’s heart. 🌿

“The god of this world has blinded the minds of the unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God” 2 Corinthians 4:4 

Believe the best about the other person. They’re not in our life for nothing. We all have redeeming qualities, as well as weaknesses. Choose not to fixate on their faults, just as we hope they don’t fixate on ours. 🌿

“A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.” – Proverbs 19:11 

If at all possible, meet in person. Going the extra mile to meet face to face reflects a heart that is eager to seek reconciliation. Texting and phone calls don’t allow the mutual benefit of reading body language and expression, which can go far in helping convey not only repentance, but also sincerity and forgiveness. We cannot underestimate the ability to offer physical signs of affection. Hugs and handshakes offer their own powerful form of healing. 🌿. 

“So he got up and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion for him, and ran and embraced him and kissed him.” Luke 15:20 

Don’t deviate from the main point of the disagreement. Bringing up old hurts that have been dealt with will only cause more damage. Keep the past in the past and your eyes on the task in front of you: resolving the problem before the chasm between you grows. 🌿

“As much as it lies within you, be at peace with all men.” Romans 12:18

Own our part in the problem and leave room to admit it if we were wrong. Be willing to move into the space of humility and pray that the other person’s heart softens in response. 🌿

“Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves…” Philippians 2:1-3 

Be eager to embrace the gift of apology. Being a Peacemaker is a beautiful thing in God’s sight. Even if the bulk of the fault lies with the other person, it will not hurt us to be the first to move toward apologizing and reconciliation; in fact, we will be blessed for doing so. 🌿

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.” Matthew 5:9 

Forgiveness is crucial. Do not dwell on what has been resolved. Move forward, grateful to have it behind you, and eager to look for ways to show evidence of a forgiving spirit. 🌿

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if anyone has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Colossians 3:13 

Nurture what has been newly planted with care and tenderness. If a relationship has suffered, lavish it with gentleness and love, not allowing it to fall into disrepair again. 🌿

“Be kind one to another, tenderhearted and forgiving one another even as God for Christ’s sake has forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:32

If the other person refuses to reconcile, accept it with graciousness, recognizing that such undemanding kindness may pave the way for a future day. Let them know you will patiently wait for them to be ready. Pray for them. Don’t speak poorly of them. Don’t grow bitter. Use the time while waiting to prepare for the day that hopefully they’ll be ready to talk. Show love and respect, and trust that God will work out the details in His time and His way. 🌿

“A hot tempered man stirs up dissension, but a patient man calms a quarrel.” Proverbs 15:18

 

Dear Lord, give us teachable hearts, and a commitment to do what is right. Generously pour on us a compassion for those that are also walking this journey of life. May we spill over with forgiveness since we ourselves have been forgiven much. Help us stay steady in trial, hopeful in hurt and anchored in our trust of You and Your plan for our lives. In the matchless name of Jesus, I pray, Amen 🌿🙏🏻

 

 

 

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Orphan Care

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While living in California, our family became involved in a ministry called Safe Families for Children. Much like foster care, but without compensation and with a more reasonable, lenient structure that operates through area churches to find host families willing to temporarily care for children in crisis, SFFC had its’ start in Chicago in 2002 and our church in California was just embarking on it.

After going through the background checks and training and approval process, our family got to host our very first placement – a sibling group of 4 sisters! It certainly was a challenge at first, going from 5 kids in the house to 9 overnight, but again, we truly saw God at work in amazing ways and were thrilled to be able to participate in such a fulfilling ministry.  It became a family ministry – we all needed to help welcome the kids into our home, be willing to give up some time, comfort, space and convenience – how better to show the love of Christ than to be hospitable to these kids in crisis? 

God has used Safe Families to stretch our faith even further, as well as a very visible way for our kids to learn that choices have consequences. Many people who use the ministry are just people who find themselves in a tough spot and needing some temporary help as they are completely without support as they face a crisis, loss of a job, loss of a spouse, temporary setbacks that no one could have predicted; others though, are there because of some poor choices they have made; needing to serve jail time, or go through drug counseling, and are without anyone to come alongside and help with their kids during a tough time. 

Better than lectures, better than threats, these real life examples of the fall-out that can happen when we make bad choices spoke volumes better than we could have to our kids. 

Better than lectures, better than judging, these real life people see Jesus at work in our lives when we reach out to help them in a practical way during their time of difficulty.

Yes, it was wearying, yes, it was chaotic at times; but did God teach us some valuable lessons through it? You better believe it.  Plus it started to build hearts of compassion in our children.

They began to realize that God might not ask us to do grandiose things, but we are all capable of doing the simple things of love and kindness that He asks of we who claim to follow Him. It is a ministry that is still close to our hearts today and that we have stayed involved in, still hosting here in Chicago (the tale of how that move transpired will be shared in an upcoming post).

Four years into it, with multiple placements, I wrote an Open Letter that I dedicated to each of the children we’ve had in our home. It is such a fruitful and fulfilling ministry, I want to share the glorious gift of involvement with everyone I can, in hopes that it might encourage others to take a step of faith in participating in this marvelous and practical way.

Dedicated to Each of the Precious Safe Family Children we have had the Privilege of Hosting:

Little did we know, oh little one, how mightily you would capture our hearts.  We thought, when we took you into our home, that we were helping you- but God, in His sovereign wisdom, knew that you were just what we needed as well.  Yes, those first few days were hard – we were trying to learn about you, your likes and dislikes, and you, cautiously were learning that we are here to help you, and over time, trust blossomed, and warmth and safety won.

I marvel that we get to watch you grow and discover the world around you, however briefly. Your delight at learning of a whole new world on the ground around our feet was priceless ~ you sat entranced watching the bugs crawl and the ants busily working on their projects, distracted by the wind bending the delicate stems of the nearby flowers, as birds sang their songs of joy into your listening ears.  Perhaps, have you never been exposed before to the marvelous melodies of nature?  Your peels of laughter as we whirled you through the air, around and around, made me wonder: have you ever laughed with such abandon before?

 Your smiles, slow at first, have been the loveliest thing to greet us each morning as you wake; and, as you began to trust that this place is full of love for you, you have softened.  A part of you has awakened under the gentle touch of caring hands that hold you when you fall, delighted smiles bestowed from your sweet gifts of colorful pictures scribbled with chubby crayons,  contentment as we read books, play games, sing songs and make our way through life, together, for a time. 

I don’t know if you will ever know that for this precious and fleeting bit of time, we shared our journey of life – will your young mind ever recall the laughter we have shared? The love that has grown in our hearts for you? Perhaps, some day, far from now, you might have a hazy memory of this time, a little fuzzy around the edges, but certain in the feeling that you were safe and cherished and loved.

I know that our family has been blessed by having you join our circle, even if it is only for a few weeks or months; you have reminded us of one of the best things God has put in the human soul: to have compassion on our fellow man, and the ripples of blessing that follow our acting on that compassion.

Soon, all too soon for us, you will be going back home, to a mom that loves you; not perfectly, but deeply. She has dreams for you, wants good things for you – she must, or she never would have sought the help of people like us who want to support her through a difficult time in her life, to come around and for a while, care for her most precious gift on Earth: her children. She is as precious to us as you are, for she is hurting and alone, in need of the unconditional love that only Jesus offers us; we pray for her healing, for her discovery of the thing she needs the most as she uses this time to build a home for you to come back to, a healthy place for your family to flourish and grow.But when you leave here, do not think that you have fully left us – the memory of you will live on; the stories of what you saw, where we took you, what you learned, how you made us laugh – those things will remain with us, carefully knit into the legacy of stories that will pass down for generations to come; and we will pray for you, just like one of our own. Because, for this little while, you are one of our own. And know, just as we pray now each night beside your little bed, we will continue to plead to God on your behalf after you have gone from here, to watch over you, to protect you and to bring you to Himself as only He can.

So, for today, let’s embrace the time before us and enjoy the simple pleasures that come our way. God holds the future and we can walk with sure steps forward as we take one day at a time trusting in His love and kindness; for now, you are here and life holds great promise; and that is all we need to know.

Matthew 25:40 “The King will reply, “I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.” ~ Jesus

There are so many wonderful ways to be the hands and feet of Jesus; but there are always more people needed to participate in this great ministry… if you are drawn to learn more about Safe Families for Children, please visit www.safe-families.org .

Are there ministries you are involved in that are helping others along life’s journey? I’d love to hear about it!

Let’s talk…you know – between friends.

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Waiting on God’s Timing…Always an Adventure!

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God presented more chances for us to rely on His timing, as we had to wait for our house to sell. This meant that the kids and I stayed behind in Wisconsin for 8 months, while Mark lived out in California, searching the area, learning the job and coming home to see us every other weekend.

There were still days during this stretch that were difficult and lonely, especially for Mark. He was the pioneer, exploring on his own, missing his family and all that was familiar; at least the rest of us were in a holding pattern in our own comfortable home and familiar routine. Not to say that we were just sitting around taking it easy; no, I was saddled with the enormous (read: impossible) task of keeping our home presentable for an entire 8 months.

Selling a house with five young children who don’t stop living just because there’s a sign in the front yard inviting strangers to enter at a moment’s notice was challenging, let me tell you! I learned in a hurry some pretty creative ways to hide clutter as realtors would call giving me a 5 minute notice and were walking up our sidewalk; and struggled through numerous times we spent hours cleaning the entire house only to have a scheduled showing cancel at the last minute. There were times I wondered if God was paying attention to all the hard things we were going through – this was supposed to be an adventure, wasn’t it? Well then, where was the fun??

More than one conversation was filled with doubt and “did we make the right choice?” kinds of questions. Again and again, we reminded each other that God never promised that ‘easy’ would be part of the equation of walking in trust and faith.

My faith deepened through that valley; God showed Himself faithful again and again, and I knew He hadn’t left us…we just needed to wait on His timing. Philippians 4:19: “My God will supply all your needs according to His riches in Christ Jesus” Well how deep is that supply?? Endless! I just needed to be patient and wait trustingly.

Finally, right at the end of that school year, our house sold – it was perfect timing really; the kids were able to finish school and a week later, the movers came. We were going to be able to spend the entire summer searching for a new house, hopefully getting settled before school started fresh for the kids again in the fall ~ Thank you Lord!

Mark flew home to help wrap up details, and, eagerly, we made our Good-byes to our loved ones with tears and trepidation and embraced the new adventure that lay before us.

Are there times you feel like God’s timing is all off? Sometimes it helps when we take a look back over our shoulder to see His faithfulness to us in the past…to build our faith stronger for the unknown future we are facing. Can you remember a time of God’s faithfulness in your life? Let’s talk…you know – between friends.

 

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