Who’s in Charge Around Here??

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While all the craziness of our home life was going on with our involvement with Safe Families and the busyness of life, things were happening at Mark’s workplace.  He really loved his job, but he had already climbed within the department as high as he could.  The business culture today is so wrapped around a different philosophy than my parents’ generation.  Now, if you stay in one role for more than a few years, it can be looked upon as stagnation rather than perfecting your craft.  So, Mark posted for other positions in the company that would keep us in California, but nothing seemed to work out. He was told that if he gained some further outside experience in management, he could come back in to some different challenges down the road.

When we discussed it with the kids, again, they weren’t exactly delighted with the idea of leaving California, and they had a point: they’d heard us say God would provide friends in California and we had asked that they trust Him; they had, and now they each had some good friends.

But we really saw this move as a temporary one; we were so sure we would be back within 2-3 years – we were already sold on the area, we had had a wonderful life there, so we wouldn’t struggle at all with coming back, would we?

When we had lived in Wisconsin, we’d been part of a wonderful church plant of a Harvest Bible Chapel in the Milwaukee area, the parent church being in Elgin, Illinois. Mark and I used to drive down on Saturday nights to what was affectionately referred to as “Big church” – the main campus.  Captivated by all that God was doing there we’d dreamed of the chance to be part of it. But we had never pictured ourselves moving to Illinois –why would we ever do that when all we’d known was in the Badger state?

All the same, here we were, considering that very thing.

Before leaving our home in California to go on a weeklong visit to Wisconsin, I had called the school, Harvest Christian Academy, letting them know we were going to be in the area the next week and would there be a way our kids could see the school even though it was summertime?  The superintendent was very friendly and helpful, “Absolutely!”

So we took a day and drove down to the area that we were considering moving to.  We wanted our kids to see where they would go to school – and church, since they were the same building. 

Little did we know that while we were looking at them, they were looking at us – we had no idea that the school was working hard to grow – it all looked and sounded wonderful to us and the idea that our children would get to be part of this marvelous school was exciting to us, as we already held their ministry in such high esteem.  Meanwhile, God was encouraging their hearts that here was a family with 5 kids, eager to join in what they were doing.

We flew back to California, more open to the idea of another move.

Again, we talked extensively with our children; we all agreed that ‘coming back’ would be our top priority – this was just going to be like an extended vacation for a couple years, then we’d be right back to the state we had come to love.

Really, we felt we didn’t have a choice so we put our wonderful home on the market, and started the enormous task of moving across the country again.

Back in the Midwest, we moved to a hotel in a northwest suburb of Chicago; this temporary stay ended up lasting about four months, but this time around, we had two dogs plus a cat and the seven of us crammed into two rooms. 

Thankfully, our lodgings were at the very end of the hallway, directly across from each other. Mark and the boys and I took one room with a dog, and the three girls took the other dog and the cat in with them.  

We still chuckle at the memory of the sign that greeted us on the refrigerator when we first entered: “Welcome! We hope you find this fully furnished kitchen stocked with all the necessary tools to make your stay with us an enjoyable one!” 

Opening the cupboards and drawers revealed the contents of two plates, a bowl and a mishmash of silverware, along with a small pot with a lid, a jar opener, a corkscrew and a sieve. The girls’ room wasn’t much better, although they had an ice cream scoop and a stack of cups. Clearly, we had some gaps to fill; between the two rooms, we cobbled together a reasonably equipped kitchen and, with one or two trips to the Dollar Store, we made it functional. 

It didn’t take long for the enormity of our decision to sink in: We had left the home and area we loved, to come back to the Midwest to live in a hotel again, no more ultra bright sunshine, no more sandy beaches… only this time it was August, we were back to freezing cold weather and gray skies – and there was no going back! There were unforeseen challenges that really tried our faith; things had we known, we may have chosen very differently. It wasn’t easy starting all over again, and we started to doubt the soundness of our decision. Everyone was floundering, lonely and struggling.

“Um…Mission Control? We have a problem!”

Nearly horrified with the evidence that obviously we had not been thinking clearly the past several months to cause us to make such a rash and unutterably wrong and irreversible decision, we turned desperately to God – What had we done?? Lord, please fix this!

Then, the soothe, calming voice broke through to my frantic mind: 

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29.

Has there been a time in your life when you found yourself far from where you ever intended to be? When things just didn’t look anything like your original plans? God wants to assure us that even then, He is in control. It may look different, it may be full of some trials or hard situations, but He wants to help us grow through those very difficulties, to make us more like his Son. Let’s talk…you know – between friends.

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Homeschooling!

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We stayed for three glorious years in sunny Northern California, enjoying many of the majestic sights – Yosemite, Lake Tahoe, Monterey Bay, Carmel; trips to the ocean, fresh road-side fruit stands, plentiful sunshine and completely new experiences from what we had known in our home state of Wisconsin – we grew to love our time there and God so faithfully showered his grace on us, helping us to find a great church and make some friends.

The first school we put our kids into turned out to have some beliefs that we couldn’t agree with. We heard about an excellent Christian High School and decided our older two girls, who were by this time both in high school, would attend there for our second year of living in California. Having no other options for the younger three, I was sort of thrust in a direction I had never considered before: homeschooling. A prospect I was terrified of!

I was not a teacher! I never even went to college! The thought of my precious children’s educations being placed into my quaking and (in my mind at the time) unqualified hands was simply ~ Well, the word disastrous comes to mind!

But we were out of choices – and time. So, with great trepidation, we set out to try our hand – praying daily that God would give us what we needed to make the year a success.

As I brought my fears to God, He handed back to me a verse found in Joshua 1, “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous – do not be terrified, do not be discouraged for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you may go.”

It turned out to be a marvelous journey! I utilized the curriculum my sister recommended to me and the kids and I enjoyed the extra time together, foraging through the endless maze of learning – one interesting thing led to another and we fully embraced it all and learned together! We were able to really hone in on the few areas my children had each struggled with in the past, giving them stronger foundations on which to build.

I so appreciated the extra time I got to have with my children, better understanding their areas of weakness and strengths – if they understood something, we moved on; if they didn’t, we simply ‘parked’ there until they did. It was very fulfilling, and I am glad we have it in our memory bag of experiences.

As wonderful as I ended up thinking homeschooling was, the four of us sitting around our dining room table left very little chance for any of us to meet people and make friends; since we hadn’t gone back to the first school, our younger kids were still relatively friendless; so we agreed, they needed to go to school. God allowed Mark and I to find a marvelous school for them the following year.

I still look fondly back at that year; I realized that had I allowed my fear of the unknown to stop us from trying this, we would have missed out on SO much! I discovered in a very intimate and tangible way that I serve an AWESOME God – and if He is calling me, He will also equip me.

Was it always easy? Certainly not! But was it worth every stretch mark of growth I saw in my life as a result? You bet it was!

Sometimes the idea of trying something out of our comfort zone can cripple us…but God wants us to be willing to venture out into arenas in our lives that He is beckoning us to join Him, trusting that He is with us and can carry us through.

Are there areas you’ve opened up to God to stretch you so He can build your faith deeper? Are you fearfully holding back from walking through a door God has opened for you? Let’s talk…you know – between friends.

 

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California Here We Come!

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In 2008, our family moved from Wisconsin to northern California for my husband Mark to take a new job with a wonderful company. The opportunity came out of left field for us; Mark had applied and interviewed for a position that would have kept us in Wisconsin; it came down to him and an internal candidate.

The company felt they needed to go with the other guy for loyalty sake – something we fully appreciated. However, Mark had impressed them through the interview process and they said they would find him a job – if we were willing to move out to corporate – something definitely not on our radar screen! By God’s grace, they granted us sufficient time to mull this incredible opportunity over.

Every step of the way, I remember feeling like no matter what concern I would bring to God’s attention, he would answer with a resounding “Go.”

Our first big area of concern was what would it be like to raise a family in a coastal area with no yards? That prayer was answered in a phone call inviting Mark and I to take a trip out to the area for a few days to see if we “could picture raising our family there”. Remarkable! So we flew out – marveling at how God was orchestrating the details for us.

The company hired a tour guide to drive us around. On the morning of the 3rd day, both feeling quite discouraged because everything we had seen thus far wasn’t very ‘family friendly’, we prayed over our hotel breakfast “Lord, you know our hearts, we really were hoping to be able to take this job, but everything we have seen isn’t the kind of life we ever pictured for raising our kids. We only have these few hours left Lord, before we get on that plane this afternoon. If you want this for us, please show us something we can envision for our family.”

Our guide walked into the lobby, ready to go. Mark, who had been up most of the night researching local real estate, showed him his laptop and asked him “where would we find a house like this one?” It was a pretty house, within our price range, showing a bit of green grass around it.

He looked at it, shrugged his shoulders and said “hmm, East Bay – I’ve never heard of that – well, let’s put it in my GPS and find out.”

On our 40-minute drive out of the city, we went through a tunnel – and emerged on the other side to the sight of green, rolling hills! There were parks and whole neighborhoods with grassy yards and lots of children playing and riding bikes!

Our guide commented “Wow – I’ve lived in the Bay area for over 15 years and never knew any of this was here!” Mark and I got on the plane that afternoon elated over the possibilities!

We felt like God was directing our path in such specific ways, and, after that, we were out of excuses; so we accepted the golden opportunity with excitement, being sure to include our kids in all that God was doing to help us move forward.

Still, another issue was the pay – the job, though certainly more than he had been making, wouldn’t fully cover the additional costs of living in the more expensive state. I tentatively brought this to the Lord in prayer; a couple days later, the man who would be Mark’s new boss called him saying, “I need to let you know that you won’t be reporting to me – I gave my notice to follow a dream of opening my own small business. So you’ll report to Carol until she fills the position.” A few days later, that call was followed by one from Carol, “Mark, I’ve been looking over your resume, and you really have more skills and experience than the job you were considering so I’d like to offer you his old job instead. It comes with more pay, of course.”

Whoa Lord…crazy right??

By now we knew without question that we needed to do this – to fully put ourselves out there, trusting that God would take care of us. How could we instruct our precious kids that following and trusting God in all things is the right way to live if we weren’t willing to follow that truth ourselves?

No, we didn’t know anyone out there – but God did!

No, we weren’t sure where exactly we would go to church or school or any of those things – but God did!

We were excited to test His full sufficiency – and the only way to do that was to remove ourselves from all we had ever known for forty years of life, and JUMP!

It was SO scary, but I didn’t want our comfort zone to be the dividing barrier between really truly relying on God for everything and just believing in it as a nice theory. What more could God show us if only we went willingly, trusting Him? And so, we decided to go to lands unknown (well, by us at least)

Isaiah 41:10 tells us, “Fear not, for I am with you, do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Are there areas in your life that you don’t want to relinquish to God? What might be holding you back from letting go and letting God take control? Let’s talk…you know – between friends.

 

 

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